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see reason.
I warrant you, my liege, said the bookish Troll. Down in
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the mine passage it was at first gloomy until eyes accustomed to
the soft amethyst lighting. The group of Oz leaders strode along
in the wake of the troll guard, the crown-bearing fairies flying
interference. Some hundreds of yards on they came to the works
office.
The queens peeped in, while the guardstrolls cleared their
throats, whistled, and picked their noses. Within the room a
number of important-looking executive-type trolls sat at desks,
absorbedly waggling their fingers in their ears and clacking their
teeth.
Er pardon me, spoke royal Ozma. We are Rulers of
Fairyland and Oz, respectively. We wish to have conference with
the leader of the Troll nation.
I am the leader of the Trolls, stated a vast individual with
very large ears and no brainpan.
(This was the celebrated Garble.) What s the story?
Oh. Well, we are come to arrange for the full resumption of
jewel shipments to the Amethyst City and no more agitation.
A camel train loaded with gems went off to A-town this
morning, informed Garble. That is, Old Amethyst City. Is that
where you meant?
Hardly, replied Ozma. I referred to my capital down in
Gillikinland South, you know. It was formerly called after some
other, inferior gem.
Oh! Well, they re loading an extra-large shipment for that
very destination at this moment. Wanna look?
The troll chief seemed curiously unmoved by the majesty
of the visiting royalty, nor did he bat an eye as he spotted the
glowing Crown of Love and Wisdom being borne back and forth
through the air out in the gallery way, He just motioned the
company to follow after him.
A half-mile hike along branching mine passages brought the
party to a railed-off ledge from which there was a marvelous
view down across a vast violet-lit cavern, at all sides of which a
host of troll laborers hacked with picks at the cavern walls. As
faceted amethysts rattled down in cascades from the mining
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faces they cast a million purple sparkles of reflected light. The
viewers were nearly dazed by the brilliance.
This is extremely gratifying. declared Princess Ozma at
last. We are indeed pleased to see that the recent er, dispute
has blown over. May we enquire how the um, change of policy
was arrived at?
You mean why we Trolls decided to straighten up and fly
right? Knock off striking and get back to work?
Yes, something like that, answered the girl ruler, who
would not herself have expressed it in just those terms.
It was those envoys from the kid queen down in Emerald
City oh, sorry; that d be you, wouldn t it? Garble puffed out
his cheeks and growled acknowledgingly.
And the Emerald City s the Amethyst City now, he went
on. Yeah, well, those envoys are a couple of mellow little
fellows. Right away our lot couldn t help admiring them. What
winning ways: What delightful gestures! What charm! Their
thousand captivating quirks of face and jerks of limbs have be-
come all the rage here in Trolldom by now.
Here Garble yawned, sneezed, and belched extravagantly.
Our former fill-in occupations of sitting on our hands
or fins or flippers and hanging our heads or, in a few cases,
plodding around in picket lines began to seem duller than the
dullest. Suddenly all the popularity went out of them.. Instead,
picking the teeth, snapping the fingers, and softshoe numbers
became the great fad. The guys couldn t wait to get back to the
mine faces when the envoys set the example.
Ozma was frankly puzzled. Envoys ? She didn t remem-
ber Great fays! he meant those two dimwits Lapstart and
Draxton, whom she had dispatched offhand to get lost, if
possible, in troll country. They couldn t have ! But she recalled
with a gasp what the strange tics and fidgets of the trolls had
reminded her of .
There they are now, hummed Garble. We appointed them
gang bosses so the workers, when they flagged, could look to
them for inspiration. He pointed and moved his feet in a
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slowed-down version of a Highland reel.
The queens, wizard, and, as it proved, perfectly supernu-
merary Ugliest Troll peered, and at last they saw them: on a
raised platform far below on the cavern floor. The two tiny
figures in traditional uniforms of Guardsmen of the Palace of
Magic hollered encouragingly through megaphones, in between
fits of coughing, giggling enchantingly, and delivering Bronx
cheers.
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C H A P T E R F I F T Y - O N E
Ruler Fattywiggins had quitted the Throne at last, and for-
ever, and taken her place on the palace balcony to witness the
bicycle-borne arrival back at her capital and capitol of Ozma,
hereditary regent of all the Ozzes (branch offices in Burzee and
Mo). At her sides stood temporary Prime Minister Xavier Jaxon
and Serena the Sweetly Singing Seamstress and a number of
others of the court dignitaries, while down in the cellars the Herr
Kapellmeister peeled potatoes.
There she is how! screamed genteelly songstress Serena
in a clear high A-flat. Afterwards though she didn t know
whether to turn to Xavier on her left or Langley on her right for
confirmation.
Ozma pedaled elegantly, right up to the wrought-bronze
gates in the palace-grounds fence. There she jumped down
and presented her credentials to General Omby Amby Battles
standing at stiff attention. As everyone expected, he let her in,
followed by hundreds of fairies of. various sizes, a number of
guardsmen, trolls, etc. No one had attention to spare to count
them. All eyes were glued on the Crown of Love and Wisdom
which floated on high, borne on its royal purple robe and
casting off continuously rich gleams of purple brilliance.
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The procession passed within the Palace and soon in the great
Throne Room and Presence Chamber there were touching scenes
of reunion.
And how have you fared then, my dear Fattywiggins, as
Acting Queen of Oz? enquired Ozma indulgently when the
first greetings had been exchanged.
Oh, fair to middling, Your Grace, simpered Fattywiggins,
bulging devoutly. I uh, got rid of that awful kapellmeister as
kapellmeister. I arranged to dispose of one of the magic eggs
that strange woman left with you. And I ve started on Bergson s
The Elan Vital Comes Back. Other than that not too much has been
happening. As you see, everything s completely purple by now.
That s as it should be, the true Girl Ruler surprised her
favorite by saying. As for those eggs, I suppose we ll never know
what they were supposed to be used for.They would seem to
be completely de trop. Shall we have them made into egg flips?
What do you think, Fatty?
Fattywiggins was not able wholeheartedly to endorse her
royal chum s suggestion. Instead she tried to mask her
disconcertion by enquiring enthusiastically after the success of
fairy Ozma s quest.
All missions accomplished, exclaimed the dainty queen
with satisfaction. Your caresso-pigs were found and restored
to the bosom of their family. You ll see them at the Birthday
Ball! There s still time for all the festivities to go forward as
planned. Now, of course, the star turn of the holidays is to be
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